Friday, January 20, 2012

Sleeping With The Fishes

What would YOU do in a room like this?

My first thought, what an incredible place to have a romantic weekend getaway in!!

My second thought, wow, I could NOT get comfortable…you know…with…doing…you know, romantic weekend getaway stuff WITH THOUSANDS OF FISH STARING AT ME!

My third thought went something like this:

Imagine a conversation between two fish out of a thousand, staring at an…amorous…couple in an underwater glass bedroom:

Bobfish:    Hey, Joefish, we got another couple of weirdos down here! 

Joefish:    HOW in the ocean do they do that?? And why? It looks messy.

Bobfish:    And painful. Hey…* heh heh * …tap the glass… * heh heh* 

Joefish:    You MORON!! I told you last time: NO FINGERS!! You WERE the egg at the bottom of the bunch, weren't you...

Bobfish:    Ok, ok…c'mon…FWAP the glass with your tail. Cmon! It's FUNNY. Make 'em move...

Joefish:    They ARE moving...

Bobfish:    PLEEEEEEEEZE????

Joefish:    ohmigoldfish…Fine! *fwap fwap fwap*

(Humans fall off bed)

Bobfish:    Dude. That CRACKS me up…*swims in circles really really fast* C'mon…let's go find some rocks to spit...

end scene.

I must share my fourth thought, which was "to hell with the fish, what about scuba divers with cameras?"

My fifth thought, was:  How'd you like to wake up with a shark hovering over your head. "Oh, good morning Mr. Shark! Why, yes, I do smell like peanut butter and see, we had a food fight last night... What? You LIKE humans who taste of PB and J? Hey...why don't you go eat Bobfish...he's annoying as hell. By the way, how can you smell through plexiglass?"

I have weird thoughts. I know.

By the way, this is a room in the Maldives at the Conrad Maldives, Rangalli Island and costs a mere $11,700 a night. For that price you'd better believe I would throw every inhibition to the wind! I'd be all "cmON fish get an eyeful!!!" I'm a brazen hussy.

With weird thoughts.

So, in conclusion, I'd just like to say that as a scuba diver and a hopeless romantic, I'd find the underwater bedroom quite interesting both inside AND out :).

And, in final conclusion conclusion, as my friend pointed out, in some places, sleeping with the fishes has a whole different meaning.


  1. Nice use of an email picture I seen recently Kris lol.

    This is hilarious, good to see you've still got your humour :)

  2. LOL!! That was a great email. Thank you :) And, hey, my humor is my saving grace.


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