Friday, July 13, 2012

Mommy's in the 21st Century

You would think as a graphic designer and blogger (even an occasional video blogger) and ultra-Facebooker that I would have some sweet home office tucked away, industrially cool, white/grey/black stuff, meshy chairs, clean, neat desk and lots of doodles magnetically tacked to my brushed metal wall decor.


I have an old (4 or 5's like 100 in dog years) computer that is so crammed full of crap and old op systems I gave up trying to work on it AGES ago. It sits on one of those plastic folding tables and doubles as a clean (sometimes dirty) clothes rack. And by "rack" I mean buried under crap I don't feel like hanging up/put in drawers. Besides, I should have held a memorial service the day I couldn't even drag work from a CD-ROM onto the desktop. Honestly, all it would take is for me to hack up a couple hundred to get it up to, dare I say "speed", but I work with CS5.5 which would cause my once glorious and shiny computer to scream like a little girl and explode. I am going to have it cleared out and add memory, etc., to it and then let my elementary school-age kids use it for school reports and Solitaire.

Besides, I don't even have internet at home.



(Is that your mocha chocca latte sprayed everywhere??)

I can hear you now: "What's this "not have internet" you speak of? Even homeless people have internet!!"

What can I say?? After the ex left, we had joint custody of our laptop for about 5 stinkin' minutes and then it was his. Blah blah. Whatever.

Without a working computer in the house and another income, I gave up on extras like internet. Besides, who needs it with smartphones these days? People with REALLY BAD EYESIGHT, that's who!

I think I have gone blind in the last three years trying to read my Facebook on my teeeeeensy Blackberry screen.

As for blogging, well, I attempted – as noted in previous entries – to try my hand with my iPad to type out some blogs. Not so great without the 100 dollar keyboard. Ugh. Stoopid touchscreen keys. Clearly my blogging I have only posted what, 1 flippin' blog in three months? Interestingly enough I have not had all of humanity clamoring at and picketing my doorstep demanding I come back to blogspot. Srsly? What the hell is wrong with you people anyway? *tsk #crossingarmsandlookingaway.


And, again, as I have ESP (or a very clear understanding of how very self-serving all this is), I know you are now thinking, "What's the point of this diatribe?" It's to say: "YAY!! I put my big girl panties on and bought a laptop all for myself!!"

*Smacks table with hand, by-gum.

I'm not giving details on make and model, though I have to say when I utter specific letters in succession, like "I" and "B" and "M" I gack a little involuntarily. Sometimes, even on purpose.

So, here I am, busting my new fruity laptop keyboard with this completely innocuous blog entry. The good news is I am really hoping this will get me to start writing regularly again.

Is it a curse, a blessing? Ah. You say tomato, I say tomato. Wait, what?

Awwwww, it's soooo nice to be back. I don't care what all you people running away are screaming about.


  1. Welcome back to the laptop community :) I know you have been missed with your wildly wicked sense of humor! Love you, girl!
    <3 Kym

  2. I do love your blogs Kris and have been an avid reader for a few years now. But I also know you lacked the facilities to blog regularly... Been there, done that too but that was my own fault for taking my frustration out on my baby (old laptop)

    Welcome back :)

  3. Hi you two!! Thanks for the welcome back and here I am day two with two blogs. I could be back full steam, we'll see! LOL!


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