Tuesday, April 9, 2013

H is for HUMBLE



Humility. Being humble. Being humbleD. At some point in my life, a long time ago, I don't know when, a princess chip was wired into my brain. The result has been a truly misplaced sense of entitlement that would make Her Royal Majesty blush. I have been working diligently the last few years to right-size myself. I am at my worst when I am in a line at the grocery store or in traffic. I've written about this before. I have terrible line karma. One day there occurred a particularly shocking event in which I exalted in getting behind a lone woman without a cart, only to be crushed the instant her husband, for whom she was saving a spot, showed up with a piled-over shopping cart. I reckoned I would be there for days. I huffed, rolled eyes, whispered loudly, grumbled until finally she had the NERVE to say snark back, to which I belted...LET IT GO ALREADY! Oh I was PISSED. Pissed pissed pissed. And it held me in its grip for the entire car-trip home.

Oh.
My.
God.

I am SUCH an ASS sometimes.

Good news is, I was able to use that as a scenario about how NOT to behave (yes. *cringe* my kids were with me....and believe me, they are learning from me...good and bad). I said yes it was annoying that the woman did that but there's no law or rule saying that she can't. I was just angry because I thought I'd be out of the store in short order versus standing in line for 10 minutes (they had a LOT of small stuff to buy).

We went to another store en route, and lo and behold it happened again. Just as I was heading to the short line, a couple shoppers beat me to it.  ARE YOU FRICKIN' KIDDING ME.

Then it dawned on me. Maybe it's a lesson God is wanting me to learn about patience. I hate lessons about patience. They usually involve waiting. But the lesson was not lost. I had that moment of clarity and am grateful for it. I can remember that the next time and see if I can attain some semblance of composure and dignity next go 'round.

It is important for me to remember every day that I am a human among humans, a worker among workers. That to be a friend is to do the things for other people you would like to have friends do for you. I must always realize that I have an opportunity each day to spread kindness rather than anger or frustration (oh, dear Lord, I fail miserably often. How do nice people do it??) I need always remember that humility doesn't mean I am a doormat, nor must I bow down to others and meekly allow them to run roughshod over me. It is to be connected on a soul level, human to human, on a daily basis. When connecting in THAT manner – and not the what do you wear, drive, earn status that provides false pride – I am beautifully equal. And so is everyone else.

2 comments:

  1. Putting the Queen to shame? Oh that is classic. I loved it. Patience is NOT my friend either. I try hard (obviously not hard enough) but I am very guilty. Like sitting in the school car line to drop of kids in the morning and there is always a car that sits forever while the kids are doing only God knows what like they didn't know they were getting out of the car this morning???? Some of us have a job to get to. And I love the parents who don't move the car until the kids are through the front door. There are teachers opening/closing car doors for the kiddos. Do they really think a kidnapper is going to nab their child with all those teachers watching? And how fast are you going to help sitting in a driver's seat??? Oh no, I'm on a rampage. Taking a deep breath.

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  2. Ahhhh....my B is for Breathing! post may be helpful!! LOL!! Yeah, German/Irish, Redheaded, Leo, Only-child. There is not enough kowtowing in the world for the likes of me. *cringe* Boy I try each day to remember my place and try to put myself in other people's shoes.

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